Ever notice how certain people behave differently when you’re interacting with them alone than they do when they’re in a group?
It makes sense that this happens - people want to feel like they’re part of an ingroup, and will change themselves in major ways in order to fit in - even if it’s not who they really are. Unfortunately, in almost every case I’ve witnessed, the person always becomes “worse” (e.g. more mean, less caring, etc) when they’re in the larger group. Again, this makes some sort of sense. When a person makes a conscious (or possibly even a not-so-conscious) decision to pander to a group, they pay more attention to the group’s needs than to the needs of any preexisting relationship with an individual they may have had.
Thoughts?
Posted on Saturday, November 12th, 2005 at 1:46 am. Categories: Thoughts. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can also leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
2 Responses to “People - together and alone”
Danny Silverman Says:
November 13th, 2005 at 9:45 pm
Yes.
Oh, you mean thoughtful thoughts? Um…I try not to do that. Cause it sucks. And it can often be taken as a sign that a relationship is going down hill, or wasn’t great to begin with. Then again, sometimes people are not trying to be hurtful but are just completely oblivious, and talking to them might help.
K Says:
November 14th, 2005 at 10:19 am
I think that sort of thing is fascinating–it shows how people view themselves in terms of that particular group, so it reveals a lot about them and what they prioritize.
See? I’m commenting in your damn blog. Comment in my livejournal!
And I’m sorry I didn’t call you back, I actually called because I had a question but then it got answered and things were a little chaotic this weekend. You’ll read about it later.
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